I went to see my doctor this morning.
"How can I help you?" she asked.
"I found a lump while I was in the bath," I replied, pointing downwards.
"Oh right," she said, "Take your trousers down for me."
After having a good old feel of my private parts for a few minutes, she said, "It feels fine to me."
"I said, "That's good to know thanks very much... But what about this lump on my toe?"
------------- Some days you are the dog,
some days you are the tree.