Why did I suddenly get too old to drive my beloved van. The thought of getting behind the wheel frightens the life out of me. her and I have driven England, Europe etc but suddenly I just daretent do it. Is it me or have others felt thr same?
I don't think the pandemic has helped. In the first year of lockdown we spent 8 nights away and last year still only managed 35 nights. I think you can get out of the routine. We have just put everything back in the van after its annual service and I ache allover!!! I suppose we all have to face our own frailty. Why not try a short trip from home?
Let us start at the very begining. Loose the last 2 years, forget all about them. Is your van at home? Do you have the ease of getting to her if not.
For us we have to travel as much as 2 miles to ours. A nuisance, but no space at home.
Ok. I would if I were you go to her with keys in hand, and a picnic lunch ready to eat. Have a sort out of all the things you did not use the last time you went out. Put everything in 'the take it home box'.
Have your lunch and a hot(?) drink. Sit there and think about all you have done in her. To go over the pleasant memories is going to make all the difference. Now for the big IF, MAYBE, WHAT IF's.
If your still living where your details above state, then I am sure you can do this. If you can't maybe a friend can help. Take the / get the van near to anywhere you fancy on the Lincolnshire coast and use her as a caravan. No need to drive her ever again. People use caravans that way. A seasonal pitch on a site that suits is what you want to ask for at any site on the coast or inland if it is too a big a distance to drive for you. Maybe a friend could get her there. I certainly will do this when I feel as you do. Think about what you will do without the van also. Don't let it get to you. Good Luck.
We are a bit younger than you, luckily OH still feels able to tow. I dread when that time comes when he is unable, but it comes to us all unfortunately.
Some useful suggestions above, can't offer any more I'm afraid. Good luck!
Not a very nice statement an old timer once said to me. However its a fact of life...
NOW'T LAST FOREVER
Maybe its time to hang up your keys, pass over to relatives, sell, site it. etc.etc. You still have all your memories, of the great times you've had.
What we must remember is the roads we travel on are getting no better! The traffic seems to increase day by day! Then finally as we get older we cannot expect our reflexes to be the same, eyesight, etc.etc.
I don't mean any of my comments to be in a derogative way, just facts of life.
Good on you for sticking it out for so many years.
Better to be SAFE than sorry.
I’m 69 so ok right now but I have told my kids to take my car keys off me If I don’t realise when I am no longer safe to drive. I hope I do realise myself when I am no longer safe of capable & give up without a fight.
I don’t think my Mum ever forgave me for taking her keys as she descended into Alzheimer’s but she had to be stopped which was undignified for her after a good long life.
So it’s ok. I you want to stop driving your motorhome then do that. It was good while it lasted. Yes it is a sobering thought that eventually we will have to give up the things we worked all our lives for & loved doing in our retirement but none of us will live forever. Accept it & embrace it because it’s ok.
I like the seasonal idea.
Or take one of either Club’s driving lessons? They’re aimed at people starting out or wanting a refresher.
Once the negative thinking starts, next thing you won’t step outside the front door. Been there.
There is nothing wrong in being 84,providing you have some mobility and vision.
(I still manage daily to cover the mirror with kisses)
Luckily, my wife who is only 82, is the driver of our set up. We tend to use motorways more when driving in France, and an "overnight" stop is usually at least 2 days. We cycle to shops more than walking and find that we snooze more often, especially after the 3rd glass of wine.
So continue for as long as you can and for as long as you can afford the extortion of health insurance.
Let's dismiss one aspect, there is nothing WRONG with stopping driving, we will all get there at some point, and indeed it it the RIGHT thing to do at some point! That said, it is a hard fact to accept that we can no longer continue with a much loved pastime.
Driving shouldn't be a terrifying experience for a long experienced driver in a familiar vehicle (crazy antics of other road users aside!), and arguably the cause of that needs analysing in a little more detail before anyone including yourself says 'hang up your keys'. Are you just plain scared of driving ANY vehicle, are you worried by the size of the camper, are certain road conditions of particular concern etc.?
No two ways about it, Covid and it's restrictions have impacted most of us and our motoring, my already modest mileage has been halved and I didn't drive the car for weeks on end. In fact 90% of my mileage over past couple of years was towing the caravan. Can't say that I felt nervous about going out to drive (solo or towing), but on a few occasions once in the car, it did feel a little strange and unfamiliar for a while, bit like driving an unfamiliar vehicle on unfamiliar roads, it just didn't feel quite so instinctive and I had to 'work' at it with conscious effort. A few trips and a few miles, and the old instincts returned.
Assuming health and faculties are still Ok, why not just take the Camper for a few short drives on familiar roads at the quietest time of day, just to get back in the swing of things, maybe take someone with you for moral support AND to drive the camper back if it all feels too much for you. You don't have to set out on an epic cross country journey with a destination in mind, just a few miles to readjust and maybe reevaluate if you want to carry on driving.
There does come a time when we feel it's the right thing to do to stop driving, I had a great uncle who loved his car and the freedom it gave him, but despite being in good health (he lived to be over 100) and having all his faculties, he decided that at 85 it was time to stop driving whilst he was still a good driver and safe rather than carry on up to the point things deteriorated and he was forced to do so.
I think Fiona's idea of a refresher training course is a great idea, not only will you have the support of a qualified instructor, you will be given non-judgemental critique of any driving traits that need adjustment, and nothing like positive comments from a qualified instructor to boost confidence. It doesn't commit you to carrying on if you don't want to, but it might allay fears and give you a few more years of a pastime you obviously love.
IMHO, I think a little more thought and maybe a little bit of support/assistance before you finally decide to hang up your keys, and if hanging up your keys is your choice, that's fine too, just look back on all the good times and feel blessed you had those, not regret not doing it any more.
if you dont feel safe behind the wheel then why not sell your van and use the money and book coach trips even get a taxi from your house to the pickup point, no worries about driving a van then and you get to see some nice places plus there would be others that would help you.
One of the reasons I decided to get my van as soon as I could tap into my pensions was to be able to go out and about when I am still fit and healthy enough to do so.
The film Nomadland I saw last year struck a chord for certain, in that I do not wish to wait until I retire before I go out and about, as it would be at least another 10+ years before I retire!
Hence I am spending some money to kit the van out with a good and reliable MiFi system, so that she is truly a van for work, rest and play.
As for driving, it does not bother me so far, except when it is at night and the weather is foul. Just take lots of breaks as soon as I feel tired, and factor in the extra time required. I would minimise night time driving as much as I could, especially in areas that I do not know well.
DK
------------- Apple The Campervan - A Van For Work, Rest & Play!
- 2027: ? NL+DE+FR
- 2026: FR+DE
- 2025: 17/77
'24: 10/49; '23: 9/47;'22: 8/46; '21: 9/34
* Ex-tenter
* Treat life events like a dog: if you can't eat it, play with it or hump it, p1$$ on it and walk away!
Quote: Originally posted by decor55 on 01/3/2022
if you dont feel safe behind the wheel then why not sell your van and use the money and book coach trips even get a taxi from your house to the pickup point…
Have you ever been on a coach trip?! They do have their place. But. They’re nothing at all like going away in your own “home from home”. Other people’s timetable. Eat at x o’clock, like it or not. Someone will decide you’re their best mate & you can’t shake them off, you have to exchange email addresses & you get weird emails from them for months. The hotels are… well, not your own bed in your own comfy Motorhome. Breakfast is at 7:00 not 11:00 (I exaggerate). Did a coach trip, once.
So - not comparing like with like, I suggest.
Self catering or a static is a valid or better comparison.
Quote: Originally posted by Fiona W on 01/3/2022
Have you ever been on a coach trip?! They do have their place. But. They’re nothing at all like going away in your own “home from home”. Other people’s timetable. Eat at x o’clock, like it or not. Someone will decide you’re their best mate & you can’t shake them off, you have to exchange email addresses & you get weird emails from them for months. The hotels are… well, not your own bed in your own comfy Motorhome. Breakfast is at 7:00 not 11:00 (I exaggerate). Did a coach trip, once.
So - not comparing like with like, I suggest.
Self catering or a static is a valid or better comparison.
I have not been on a packaged/guided holiday for these reasons. I would only consider these for countries or locations that are not safe to travel on my own.
Likewise with cruises as I really do not wish to be stuck with people who want to be my BFF when I can't stand the sight of them.
Much prefer to go out and about in my van with my dog, on our own, doing my own things at my own pace.
DK
------------- Apple The Campervan - A Van For Work, Rest & Play!
- 2027: ? NL+DE+FR
- 2026: FR+DE
- 2025: 17/77
'24: 10/49; '23: 9/47;'22: 8/46; '21: 9/34
* Ex-tenter
* Treat life events like a dog: if you can't eat it, play with it or hump it, p1$$ on it and walk away!
Well folks, all I can say is B....r me. I never ever imagined there were so many nice people in our motor homing world. I have been on this site for years and dropped off the odd offering but never ever thought you could reduce me to tears. but you have . Thanks so much for your support and advice. We have been back over the years to our favorite places and have found where our ashes will be spread, (dont dare tread on them.A Viking funeral would be nice but not allowed.Something for the club to think about!! My van has been passed on to younger people and I hope they get as much pleasure out of her as we did. Best thing we ever bought.
A day of all things motorhome and campervan. The show is held both in the main indoor arena and across the grounds. Catering, hot drinks and food options are available. Easy access to the site and free parking included. Win one of five pairs of day tickets
Topic: getting old..84
via mobile 28/2/2022 at 8:23pm
