Insurance Quotes
Insurance Discount Campsite Offers All offers
UK Sites French Sites European Sites Map Search Text Search Near your Location Popular Searches Leave a Review My Saved Sites Add a New Site
All Sections Caravanning Camping Tent Talk Motorhomes Trailer Tents Backpacking Equipment Statics UK Campsites Camping Abroad General Chat News More Sections Latest Posts
All Adverts Tents for Sale Caravans for Sale Motorhomes for Sale Equipment for Sale Post an Advert Campsite Jobs
All Categories Caravanning Advice Caravan Equipment Tents and Camping Motorhomes Towing and Towcars Equipment Furniture and Cooking Electrical / Gas Shows and Events General More Categories
Join for Free Log In

Advertisement

Message Forums
Welcome Guest Register  Log In  Search  Latest Posts
 Reception - All Forums
  Chat , Games, Trivia etc 		Share   Post on X / Twitter  Share on Facebook  Email
Subject Topic: 50 Shades of Grey
Post Reply
Personmadasaman
04/10/2012 at 4:18pm
 Location:  Wales
 Outfit: Bailey gt75 portofin View madasaman's Profile View Profile   Reply to madasaman Reply   Quote madasaman Quote  
Joined: 13/3/2011

Diamond Member
Diamond Member

Forum Posts:   2053
Site Reviews Total: 64
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 2 
Site Reviews 2024: 5 
Site Reviews 2023: 5 
Site Reviews 2022: 2 
Site Reviews 2021: 5 
Site Reviews 2020: 1 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 4
Site Nights 2024: 17
Site Nights 2023: 25
Site Nights 2022: 14
Site Nights 2021: 28
Site Nights 2020: 14

The missus bought a

Paperback down Mumbles,

Saturday,

I had a look in to her bag;

T’was “Fifty Shades of Grey”.



Well I just left her to it,

At ten I went to bed.

And, one hour later she appeared;

The sight filled me with dread…..



In her left hand, she held a rope;

And in her right a whip!

She threw them down upon the floor,

And then began to strip.



Well fifty years or so ago;

I might have had a peek;

But Doris hasn’t weathered well;

She’s eighty four next week.



Watching Doris bump and grind;

Could not have been much grimmer.

Things they went from bad to worse;

She toppled off her Zimmer!



She struggled back upon her feet;

A couple minutes later;

She put her teeth back in and…

Said…..That I must dominate her!!



Now if you knew our Doris,

You’d see just why I spluttered,

I'’d spent two months in traction

From our last mad sex, I muttered.



She stood there nude, all naked like;

Bent forward just a bit ….

So I thought what the hell,

Stepped forward,

but stood on her left tit!



Doris screamed, her teeth shot out;

My god what had I done!?

She moaned and groaned then shouted out:

“Step on the other one”!!



Well readers, I can’t tell no more;

About what occurred that day.

Suffice to say, my jet black hair,….

Turned “fifty shades of Grey”.


-------------
74,going on 25
Beauty is in the eye of the beerholder


Personmoppetsdad
04/10/2012 at 5:12pm
 Location: The foot hills of no
 Outfit:  A full biohazard su View moppetsdad's Profile View Profile   Reply to moppetsdad Reply   Quote moppetsdad Quote  
Joined: 29/3/2009

Platinum Member
Platinum Member

Forum Posts:   1032
Tent Reviews:   1
Site Reviews Total: 0
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 0 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 0 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 0
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 0
1717

-------------
David

    

I've stood on Lego and didn't even cry!!


PersonRallye550
04/10/2012 at 6:31pm
 Location: Scotland
 Outfit: Swift Conqueror 645 View Rallye550's Profile View Profile   Reply to Rallye550 Reply   Quote Rallye550 Quote  
Joined: 13/6/2011

Gold Member
Gold Member

Forum Posts:   247
Site Reviews Total: 3
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 0 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 0 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 0
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 0
Excellent xx

-------------
Live every day as if it's your last but not at risk to others :-)


PersonJohn_Young
04/10/2012 at 9:02pm
 Location: Blackpool
 Outfit: Transporter T5 View John_Young's Profile View Profile   Reply to John_Young Reply   Quote John_Young Quote  
Joined: 22/8/2006

Standard Member
Standard Member

Forum Posts:   45
Tent Reviews:   1
Site Reviews Total: 0
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 0 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 0 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 0
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 0
Brilliant .   I'll borrow that if I may?

-------------
Of all the things I


Personc6cazzie
04/10/2012 at 9:59pm
 Location: North Yorkshire
 Outfit: Kuro 500; Bailey Orion; Fiat Ducato View c6cazzie's Profile View Profile   Reply to c6cazzie Reply   Quote c6cazzie Quote  
Joined: 14/5/2010

Platinum Member
Platinum Member

Forum Posts:   851
Site Reviews Total: 0
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 0 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 0 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 0
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 0
Brilliant! Would like to "borrow" too!

-------------
Caz :)


Advertisement



PersonTwurly
04/10/2012 at 10:56pm
 Location: None Entered
 Outfit: Swift Caravan View Twurly's Profile View Profile   Reply to Twurly Reply   Quote Twurly Quote  
Joined: 29/5/2011

Gold Member
Gold Member

Forum Posts:   215
Site Reviews Total: 1
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 0 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 0 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 0
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 0
1717 Very Good I would also like to borrow it. 17

-------------
You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only option!


PersonAlis Gang
05/10/2012 at 12:21am
 Location: Southampton
 Outfit: Elddis supreme 550 View Alis Gang's Profile View Profile   Reply to Alis Gang Reply   Quote Alis Gang Quote  
Joined: 12/8/2010

Gold Member
Gold Member

Forum Posts:   244
Site Reviews Total: 4
Site Reviews 2026: 0 
Site Reviews 2025: 0 
Site Reviews 2024: 0 
Site Reviews 2023: 0 
Site Reviews 2022: 1 
Site Reviews 2021: 0 
Site Reviews 2020: 2 
Site Nights 2026: 0
Site Nights 2025: 0
Site Nights 2024: 0
Site Nights 2023: 0
Site Nights 2022: 2
Site Nights 2021: 0
Site Nights 2020: 16

Love it!!!  17 17

Ali

 



In order to post a reply you will need to register, or if already registered please log in here

Prev       Next
Quick Links - All Forums - Chat , Games, Trivia etc - Top of Page

     Share   Post on X / Twitter  Share on Facebook  Email


Latest News, Discounts and Competitions  see all...












    Upcoming Event

UKCS Meet Motorhome and Campervan Show Exeter 20/11 to 22/11

A day of all things motorhome and campervan. The show is held both in the main indoor arena and across the grounds. Catering, hot drinks and food options are available. Easy access to the site and free parking included. Win one of five pairs of day tickets


3713 Visitors online !

Free UKCampsite.co.uk Window Sticker  -  Add a Missing Campsite

[Message Forums]  [Caravan Sites & Camping]  [Company Listings]  [Features / Advice]  [Virtual Brochure]  [Special Offers]
[Reception]  [Competitions]  [Caravans & Motorhomes For Sale]  [Event Diary]  [Tent Reviews] 

[Contact Us] 



Please note we are not responsible for the content of external sites & any reviews represent the author's personal view only. Please report any error here. You may view our privacy and cookie policy and terms and conditions here. All copyrights & other intellectual property rights in the design and content of this web site are reserved to the UKCampsite.co.uk © 1999 - 2026


Advertisement
Advertisement

Advertisement